Happiness Hotel is a song from The Great Muppet Caper.
Lyrics[]
Pops: Oh, there's no fire in the fireplace
There's no carpet on the floor
Don't try to order dinner
There's no kitchen anymore
But if the road's been kinda bumpy
And you need to rest a spell
Lubbock Lou and His Jughuggers: Well, welcome home
To Happiness Hotel
Scooter: If you've got luggage keep it handy
But you're running out of luck
'Cause the bellhops ain't too organized
And the elevator's stuck
Rizzo: Still if you don't mind friendly animals
And you can learn to stand the smell
All: Well, welcome home
To Happiness Hotel
Welcome home
(Welcome home)
Oh, welcome home
(Welcome home)
No matter where you wander
You will never do as well
Floyd Pepper: O.K. the lobby's looking shabby
And it's got the wrong address
Dr. Teeth: And the whole dang thing has been
Condemned by 'Merican Express
Janice: Still the management is cheerful
Though the whole joint's gone to hell
Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem: Well, welcome home
To Happiness Hotel
Rowlf: Oh there are bugs
Rats: There are bugs
Rowlf: And there are lice
Rats: There are lice
Scooter: Sure we have our little problems
But you'll never beat the price
Fozzie Bear: You've got ev'ry kind of critter
Gonzo: You've got ev'ry kind of pest
Pops: But we treat them all as equals
Jes' like any other guest
Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem: Though you're cleaner than the others
Still as far as we can tell
All: You'll fit right in to Happiness Hotel
Kermit and Fozzie: We'll fit right in
All: To Happiness Hotel
Gonzo: Say cheese!